The importance of saying no

We all have been tempted to gravitate toward trivialities, investing in attention and energy more than what is required- involuntary surrendering to the urgencies of life. At time, this personality that reeks of low esteem and pliable boundary lines knows no limit: one who can not face tempting situations with a firm mind leads to go off board pleasing people;losing their efficacy.

We quotidianly encounter situations that challenge our mental firmness of sticking to the business that is the need of the hour- a friend asking for favours that we should ingeniously avoid, but still agree upon, or circumstances that meddle with our personal space and tamper our self respect.We must know, dwindling boundaries give others the freedom to exploit your mental, emotional and spirituall sanity, and in severe case, it can lead to torment one to the physical levels.

We must introspect and list out the factors behind these behavioural tendenciies. Rather than focussing on the 'why is that I am unable to say NO to my friend asking me to play just one match, knowing I have a deadline and an important submission to make'; will make us to critical and harsh on ourselves, while when we focus on 'what is the state of my mind, while I encounter such a situation', the adaptive mindset will bolster us to systematically review.

If we agree to digress for a while, we must throw some light on how the springing behaviours of flattering people, taking undoable favours and giving them servile attention reveal our hidden desire to be belonged in a social group. Social groups play a persuasive role in shaping our personalities, developing biases and reaction to situations. Often in colleges or at work places, we try to impersonate a trait completely opposite to our nature, to be accepted as a group member.

Although there is a tacit mutual respect for personal space and time between friends, companions and partners, we should not promote insensitivity towards the needs of our loved ones and always offer a helping hand wherever necessary and possible.